Humble servant of the Nation

A reminder of Labor’s history of stuffing up golden situations

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The final sitting day in the parliament yesterday provided a timely reminder that Labor has a long and illustrious history of finding itself in golden situations only to totally stuff them up.

Forget the next three years, Bill Shorten and Labor could turn the dumpster fire that is Canberra at present into an inferno that could engulf it and everyone in the general vicinity in less than 12 weeks.

In other, brighter circumstances it might be the kind of efficient service delivery the punters expect from government.

Presuming Shorten and Labor win the next election (and that requires a sizeable leap of faith if not logic after yesterday’s shenanigans), one can only speculate what disasters will come its way in government. My best guess is Shorten will do a Nick Greiner, establish a federal anti-corruption commission only to find multiple members of his cabinet and ultimately himself, ensnared in it, providing an alternative meaning to the term “conviction politicians”.

In what stands as an extraordinary political achievement, Labor managed to disappoint everyone across the political spectrum yesterday — people who vote Labor, people who don’t and people who were thinking of voting Labor but now probably won’t.

It was as if the tactics committee met, handed Shorten a ball-peen hammer and told him to belt himself over the head with it, on the basis that it would feel better when he stopped.

The telecommunications access and assistance bill became law yesterday, passing through the Senate 44 votes to 12, after being waved through the House with bipartisan support.

It is, of course, a bill of the government’s making. It is a disaster, created by legal minds with little or no apparent expertise in technology. The problems with it are numerous but the biggest lies in the fact the law would require technology companies to target a single device or small number of devices, but only in a way that does not introduce a “systemic weakness” that impacts all users.

The techs I have spoken to say this is all but impossible and may lead to tech companies feeling obliged to leave the country rather than run afoul of this putrescent law. One of our most prolific and profitable industry sectors may leave our shores in droves. Well done, everyone. Throw another log on the dumpster fire.

The other major problem with the bill is it is yet another intrusion into the privacy of the citizenry. Predictably the response from the government and the opposition is of the tedious, “if you done nothing wrong, you have nothing to worry about” kind.

Labor’s favourite urger on Twitter, member for Gellibrand, Tim Watts, lectured a clearly unnerved Twitterdom on Tuesday night in an effort to bring some calm. “Wait and see our amendments,” the young MP promised. In the end Labor dropped its amendments altogether and waved the bill through.

It is a dreadful piece of law and by Labor’s own admission will need to be amended early next year, leading to the obvious question, and one that remains unanswered, why wave it through the lower house at all?

Timidity and cowardice

The old maxim that any day when the political debate turns to border security is a bad day for Labor seems to have Bill Shorten and his front bench spooked.

Labor is everywhere and nowhere on this issue. Jelly nailed to a wall.

Timidity and political cowardice are never far away with this mob.

The day started with Prime Minister Morrison facing a humiliating defeat in the parliament, with Labor and the Greens supporting a crossbench bill which would leave the decision on refugee repatriation to Australia entirely in the hands of those with medical expertise. Instead it was Shorten and Labor who were left pink-faced in embarrassment as the bill was filibustered to within an inch of its life in the Senate.

Everything Labor sought to achieve did not happen and everything it did not want to happen came to pass.

News reports today indicating Labor has softened its policy stance on refugee policy lends strength to the prevailing view that Labor is soft on border control while Shorten et al have simultaneously upset Labor voters who were hoping for a more humane policy response.

Faced with the prospect of multiple triumphs in the parliament in the morning session, all Shorten could do was lament the scoreboard at the end of the day. Win-win had become lose-lose.

As the House adjourned for the Christmas break, it was difficult to determine who felt more relieved — Scott Morrison or Bill Shorten. The only good news for both men is the parliament will sit so rarely in the New Year, they may as well call in the caterers and hire out both chambers for weddings, parties, anything. Maybe a funeral or two.

The focus in recent times has naturally been on the Morrison government and its travails. There appears to be no way out for the government, that is until we pause and turn our gaze to Bill Shorten and the Labor opposition.

And when we do, we are drawn to the conclusion that it would be madness to underestimate Labor’s capacity for political self-harm.

This column was first published in The Australian on 7 December 2018.

1,429 Comments

  • Trivalve says:

    Perentie. You need to have word with Travis.

    • Milton says:

      Do you suggest he tell him to pull his head in? He hasn’t been going too bad. Still it’s been great cricket and has seesawed a bit. Fortunately Finch is ok.
      Belgium win the world cup in hockey in a cracker final (Oz 3rd) and Tendulkar was one of the special guests.

    • Perentie says:

      Yeah, the second innings get out shot isn’t one for the highlights reel. He knows.

    • Dismayed says:

      Travis Head has had 144 First class innings for an average of 36. He will not suddenly become a consistent run scorer his career shows he will make a 50 about every 4th innings. His conversion rate of 50’s to 100’s is very low. He has only 7 tons from 144 innings. He is not the answer. Jake Lehman has 7 tons from 78 FC innings. See the difference?

      • Razor says:

        You know Dismayed sometimes it’s better to say nothing. I get the feeling Travis is a relation of Perentie’s. Do you think having something like your stats rubbed in his face is a good thing?

        You clearly lack any empathy or social skills. I imagine Christmas will be a hoot at your joint!

        Het fellow bloggers! Anyone up for a day of self flagellation, Dismal has a spare seat at his table on the 25th. Leave sense of humour at the door. Seat is beside the decommissioned crematorium oven he will be cooking the Turkey in.

        • Dismayed says:

          You know razor I don’t want or need your advice. Weak weak effort, you always have to get personal razor then whinge like the coward when serve returned . any relative who cant be flat out honest with a family member is not helping them at all. what you continually highlight is facts and honesty do not fit into your way of life. you need divisive misinformation to live your ideology all the while doing so on taxpayer funds. Oh and its a pizza oven first. No turkeys at my place you have that market tied up. No Surprises

  • Boadicea says:

    Learnt a new word today
    “Operationalise”
    Said by someone after the Polish climate conference.
    “We are now ready to operationalise…….”

    What’s with this changing nouns into verbs? So irritating.

    • Jean Baptiste says:

      Great word, a jaunty pro active word suggesting an overcoming of inertia. It’s been around for a while.
      Irritated? Good.

      • Boadicea says:

        I knew you’d pounce, JB – so I checked a dictionary before committing.
        It’s not a bloody verb. It’s been “Americanized” – and I used a “z” here just to make my new word kosher 😂

        • Jean Baptiste says:

          It’s been around since the 1950’s, if there any other words that annoy you this is probably a good as place as any to ventalize your feelings.

    • Mack the Knife says:

      Love black humour. 😘

  • Henry Donald J Blofeld says:

    I think Bill Shorten must have read this Blog, Mr. Insider as he exhorts Labor “Don’t Blow this, Not Now!” he shrilled at the ALP National Conference in Adelaide.
    If anyone can turn certain victory into defeat its Bill imho with still 5 long months to go the Christmas/New Year reset and a Budget in April from Morrison where everyone receives a “gift” the Fat Lady has not sung yet she hasn’t even left for the “Stadium”.
    I have had a few spare “shillings” on the Coalition to win, at succulent odds too.
    https://tinyurl.com/yct9t6ln

  • jackhoysted@hotmail.com says:

    just listened to a bit of Bill Shorten’s speech followed by some of Scott Morrison’s press conference.

    quite similar in a way, quite earnest, but neither sounding very convinced themselves.

  • Milton says:

    Geez those in Adelaide for the conference can smell it but can’t wait to taste glorious victory. Just got to hope for order in the ranks, to avoid all questions re birthday cakes, avoid pubs, cranky old codgers, and, and…

  • Henry Donald J Blofeld says:

    Australia’s next Governor-General will be retired General David Hurley, Mr. Insider.
    PM Scott Morrison made the announcement from Parliament House in Canberra this morning.
    Governor Hurley is a former senior Army officer and is the current Governor of New South Wales. Current GG Cosgrove will have his Term extended to allow Hurley to serve his Term as NSW Governor till the March NSW State Election.
    https://tinyurl.com/y6umm5nl

    • Trivalve says:

      I’d never have known

      • Henry Donald J Blofeld says:

        Indeed you sure wouldn’t have Trivy but take heart you never know in 2019 you too may tell us something informative but we don’t hold our breath do we Trivy. Hello Trivy. Cheers say do you remember Victoria on the Blog from years ago she was fantastic!

    • Jean Baptiste says:

      Yeah, Joe for President of the World. A very romantic view of the past.
      Oh for the good old days when the super powers really could police the public and the world.

  • Milton says:

    Sadly it was not meant to be in India as the (newish) Kookaburras get beaten by the Dutch in a penalty shoot-out at the world cup. They play the poms at 9 tonight for 3/4th and Belgium play the Netherlands at 11.30 (on Kayo). Go Red Lions.

  • Razor says:

    Just conducted an internet speed test.

    1.00 mbps download

    .36 mbps upload

    This may explain a few things 😩

    • Jack The Insider says:

      NBN?

    • Milton says:

      I just tried a few different tests and got differing results, from poor to goodish, Razor.

    • BASSMAN says:

      Vote Labor
      Di it once
      Do it right
      With Fiber to your house! No the street corner.

        • Dismayed says:

          Requires fibre optic cable for the back haul does not work well on copper. You lot have Fd it up again. At least try and find out something about what you comment on for a change.

          • JackSprat says:

            Do you honestly think the Telcos use copper from all those towers and exchanges.
            Telstra was putting fibre in all those spots and high usage areas years ago.
            I installed fibre into a company in 1995.
            Where it is not needed is into every household because people do not need it and cannot afford it.
            Now that it is to the node, and if it is not replaced with 5g or its successor, as the copper wears out it can be replaced with fibre.
            If you think it is the copper from the node that is the problem, I suggest you look at the architecture along the way and the bottlenecks that it is producing.

            • Dismayed says:

              JS you are wrong. No Surprises.

            • Dismayed says:

              The amount of copper left in the system is huge and the ongoing cost to replace is huge. the coaxial pay TV cable is rubbish and has put massive numbers of people in limbo. the problem was the ideological decision by your coalition to WRECK the most important National infrastructure project in Australia for a Century.

              • JackSprat says:

                So you are admixing that Conroy’s plan to fibre into every home would be prohibitively expensive.
                Coax has given great service for more than 20 years.
                Optus creamed the NBN with the sale of their stuff.

        • BASSMAN says:

          BALD:-Please show me show me a 5G UNLIMITED download including all the fone U can eat mobile and STD, fone line rental included for 80 a month which is wot I am on now

        • brankeepsyouregular says:

          fibre for backhaul required

    • JackSprat says:

      ADSL dies with the distance from the exchange Razor.
      NBN dies with the distance from the node if you have a copper connection

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