Humble servant of the Nation

A reminder of Labor’s history of stuffing up golden situations

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The final sitting day in the parliament yesterday provided a timely reminder that Labor has a long and illustrious history of finding itself in golden situations only to totally stuff them up.

Forget the next three years, Bill Shorten and Labor could turn the dumpster fire that is Canberra at present into an inferno that could engulf it and everyone in the general vicinity in less than 12 weeks.

In other, brighter circumstances it might be the kind of efficient service delivery the punters expect from government.

Presuming Shorten and Labor win the next election (and that requires a sizeable leap of faith if not logic after yesterday’s shenanigans), one can only speculate what disasters will come its way in government. My best guess is Shorten will do a Nick Greiner, establish a federal anti-corruption commission only to find multiple members of his cabinet and ultimately himself, ensnared in it, providing an alternative meaning to the term “conviction politicians”.

In what stands as an extraordinary political achievement, Labor managed to disappoint everyone across the political spectrum yesterday — people who vote Labor, people who don’t and people who were thinking of voting Labor but now probably won’t.

It was as if the tactics committee met, handed Shorten a ball-peen hammer and told him to belt himself over the head with it, on the basis that it would feel better when he stopped.

The telecommunications access and assistance bill became law yesterday, passing through the Senate 44 votes to 12, after being waved through the House with bipartisan support.

It is, of course, a bill of the government’s making. It is a disaster, created by legal minds with little or no apparent expertise in technology. The problems with it are numerous but the biggest lies in the fact the law would require technology companies to target a single device or small number of devices, but only in a way that does not introduce a “systemic weakness” that impacts all users.

The techs I have spoken to say this is all but impossible and may lead to tech companies feeling obliged to leave the country rather than run afoul of this putrescent law. One of our most prolific and profitable industry sectors may leave our shores in droves. Well done, everyone. Throw another log on the dumpster fire.

The other major problem with the bill is it is yet another intrusion into the privacy of the citizenry. Predictably the response from the government and the opposition is of the tedious, “if you done nothing wrong, you have nothing to worry about” kind.

Labor’s favourite urger on Twitter, member for Gellibrand, Tim Watts, lectured a clearly unnerved Twitterdom on Tuesday night in an effort to bring some calm. “Wait and see our amendments,” the young MP promised. In the end Labor dropped its amendments altogether and waved the bill through.

It is a dreadful piece of law and by Labor’s own admission will need to be amended early next year, leading to the obvious question, and one that remains unanswered, why wave it through the lower house at all?

Timidity and cowardice

The old maxim that any day when the political debate turns to border security is a bad day for Labor seems to have Bill Shorten and his front bench spooked.

Labor is everywhere and nowhere on this issue. Jelly nailed to a wall.

Timidity and political cowardice are never far away with this mob.

The day started with Prime Minister Morrison facing a humiliating defeat in the parliament, with Labor and the Greens supporting a crossbench bill which would leave the decision on refugee repatriation to Australia entirely in the hands of those with medical expertise. Instead it was Shorten and Labor who were left pink-faced in embarrassment as the bill was filibustered to within an inch of its life in the Senate.

Everything Labor sought to achieve did not happen and everything it did not want to happen came to pass.

News reports today indicating Labor has softened its policy stance on refugee policy lends strength to the prevailing view that Labor is soft on border control while Shorten et al have simultaneously upset Labor voters who were hoping for a more humane policy response.

Faced with the prospect of multiple triumphs in the parliament in the morning session, all Shorten could do was lament the scoreboard at the end of the day. Win-win had become lose-lose.

As the House adjourned for the Christmas break, it was difficult to determine who felt more relieved — Scott Morrison or Bill Shorten. The only good news for both men is the parliament will sit so rarely in the New Year, they may as well call in the caterers and hire out both chambers for weddings, parties, anything. Maybe a funeral or two.

The focus in recent times has naturally been on the Morrison government and its travails. There appears to be no way out for the government, that is until we pause and turn our gaze to Bill Shorten and the Labor opposition.

And when we do, we are drawn to the conclusion that it would be madness to underestimate Labor’s capacity for political self-harm.

This column was first published in The Australian on 7 December 2018.

1,429 Comments

  • Carl on the Coast says:

    I must say Boa, the white road marking line sprayed across the head of the dead wallaby makes one hopping mad at the obvious callousness of the Tasmanian government contractor.

    • Boadicea says:

      The only extenuating thing i can think of Carl, is that perhaps once they are going along with the paint on release maybe they can’t abruptly come to a screeching halt.
      I know the council are out at sparrow on the mt Wellington road every morning to clear the roadkill so as not to horrify tourists. 🙄

      • Bella says:

        May be they couldn’t stop but they’re not operating ‘blind’ & couldn’t see the road ahead. Wankers likely had a laugh.
        Humans can be twisted like that Boa. 🐾

  • Razor says:

    One would have to think a very big innings for Kohli and India to make 500 plus. Starc’s spell before stumps did give a little bit of hope though. Is Pujara the new Geoff Boycott of cricket!

  • Henry Donald J Blofeld says:

    POTUS Trump and the gorgeous First Lady, Melania, visit the Troops in Iraq, Mr. Insider. I also note our own PM Morrison popped by to see our Troops in Afghanistan a few days back.
    The US is withdrawing much of their OS Troops and scaling back on OS Operations.
    https://tinyurl.com/yd6h9vyk

  • voltaire says:

    JTI & all bloggers,

    Apologies for prolonged absence (albeit you may regard it as a positive) but the vicissitudes of work and then health (week in RNS) proved a salutary end to my working year….

    Best wishes to all of you regardless of race, creed, colour, gender (fluid, vapour or solid), relligion (or lack thereof), intelligence (whether inhibited thereby or not) or taste (see comments above).

    If I failed to mentioned someone’s personal predilection or peccadillo, of course I apologise in the best political/celebrity style: profusely, publicly, loudly and with not a scintilla of sincerity…..

    Now tat everyone has been offended:

    In these time of universal brou-ha-ha, when despots rule what used to be communist countries, narcissists without shame control the leading democracy, teh UK teeters on the brink of idiocy and the so-called negotiations for Brexit will be the future template at business & law schools on how NOT to conduct a negotiation (that is on the part of the UK), France suffers the idiocy of an adolescent, Italy is directionless (but may be better off than some of the directions on offer), parts of South America are closer to financial ruin than Argentina 20 years ago, Africa is again a basket case and the Middle East has not grown up in 70 years (perhaps even regressed), we should all be congratulated merely for surviving despite the best effort of our politicians!

    This blog is an enduring source of mirth be it from our host and the contributors (whether intentional or otherwise).

    Arguably what sets us apart from other species is the ability to laugh – and more improtantly for our sanity at ourselves: so thanks again.

    Wishing you all health (Especially JTI) and continuing mirth,

    voltaire (who hopes to have his first alcoholic drink in over 13 days – the longest abstinence since January 1981 which was voluntary as opposed to forced)

    • Jean Baptiste says:

      You should stay off the turps. That was excellent.

    • Boadicea says:

      And all the best to you Voltaire! Always good when you pop in 😊

    • The Outsider says:

      Good one, Voltaire.

      Having recently visited Buenos Aires, I can vouch that it is a country that’s seen better times – the architecture is amazing, but the buildings look shabby. Still, it’s not as bad as Venezuela.

      I’m glad you’re recovered and we might catch up in the New Year.

      • voltaire says:

        TO – departing for Italy tomorrow, so away January ……if you are playing what used to be the NOT, good luck and regards to mutual acquaintances.

        If you pass through later in the year, it would be nice to catch up.

        Good to be back on coffee and wine (and for them to taste good)

        cheers

        • The Outsider says:

          I’ll be at the NOT for my one annual outing and I’ll pass on your regards.

          I had some excellent offerings on NYE. Incidentally, on the wine front, I discovered a new varietal during my recent South American trip – carmenere. It’s delicious and I’ll try and get some of it here.

          Have an excellent trip!

    • BASSMAN says:

      Welcome back Bald. Add to the pot frequently!

  • Milton says:

    How to turn a modest sized box into a super duper bbq in 6 easy steps. Pretty impressive. I just hope the British museum doesn’t get a gander of what looks like a missing piece of a treasured column of the Corinthian order. The Greeks may also be interested.

  • John O'Hagan says:

    Merry Christmas and a green-left cultural Marxist gender-fluid New Year to all!

  • Henry Donald J Blofeld says:

    A wonderful message of Peace and Goodwill for Christmas and New Year, Mr. Insider, from Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth 2 and good to hear the House of Windsor is in tip-top shape and “multiplying”.
    Her Majesty sent out 750 Christmas Cards and if I catch the wretch that stole ours out of the Mailbox there will be trouble!
    https://tinyurl.com/yc7tctsc

    • Jean Baptiste says:

      Mein Gott! How effing profound!

      “My husbnd and ah, have often wondered why God did not create everyone Royal and filtha rich. Life would be so much more congenial .”

  • Jean Baptiste says:

    Had the good fortune to be involved in a splendid debate and thus inadvertently celebrated Christmas, but at least in something like an appropriate way.
    The questions was, Do the most senior religious leaders really believe in the existence of God , Allah, Buddha etc? Probably most parishioners do, but the heads of the scams and senior members of the gang?
    The inclination was that it would probably depend on what beliefs they took on in their formative years and the beliefs serve them well as a hedge bet, but apart from public display and habitual prayer senior honchos are more interested in the good life and keeping an eye on each other.

  • Trabvistch says:

    Merry Christmas to all and sundry, and Jack, trust 2019 will see the health continue to improve.

    Cheers, Trabvitch

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